Moving Through the Fear
The path of your greatest desire is also the path of your greatest resistance. Therein lies the journey.
When your heart knows what it wants, it speaks in soft whispers. It is not loud and demanding like the rational mind.
There is a perceived safety in choosing the rational mind, the voice of reason. The voice of reason that was designed to keep you safe. The logical function of the mind that was designed for our survival process. This is the loudest voice. This is the strongest signal during times of change.
However, just beneath the surface lies a quieter voice. It is a feeling in your chest, it is a guidance that emanates from the heart (compared to the logical voice that comes from the head). It quietly guides you, showing you a path. It is subtle, like a lighthouse beam flickering far on the horizon at dusk. It is always there, guiding the way, yet all too easy ignore if you’re not looking for it.
There are many times when the lighthouse beam inside your chest will flicker. An idea feels good. Inspired. Elevated. It might point to something, like “quit that job. Take that course. Hire that person. Make that move.”
And for the briefest of moments, we bask in the light — feeling its strength, enjoying the clarity before suddenly, the rational mind rushes in to protect you. It tells you all the reasons it is not safe to follow the light.
It tantalizes you with fear and anxiety, distracting you and dissuading you from moving towards the light. The voice manipulates you with fear, using all the knowledge it has of your past failures against you.
And suddenly, you’re at a crossroads. Either ignore the flickering signal, instantly diminish the fear and stay paralyzed right where you stand, or move towards the light, even as the mind protests and the fear comes on in full strength.
Caving into the mind feels more comfortable. Just ignore that light, pretend you never saw it, go about your way. Pushing the idea from the flickering light of inspiration to the side stops the fear. The anxiety levels drop and your protective mind feels that your survival is ensured for one more day. Great! Whew!
You have chosen to listen to the voice of fear, the voice of survival. You have practiced once again ignoring your guiding light, making your powers of ignore-ance of this light ever stronger.
Pretty soon, as the years go by and you continue to strengthen your powers of ignore-ance — choosing to honor fear, choosing to move according to the mind instead of the light — you wonder “where did my spark go?” “How has my life passed me by?” or “Surely, there has to be more to life than this?”.
As you learn that the voice of inspiration shouldn’t be listened to, as you strengthen the power of ignore-ance, and as you listen to the voice of fear, you eventually learn that your inner wisdom can’t be trusted. The voice of fear is in the driver seat, and it rules you with a constant low level anxiety.
Sometimes the mind is devious. It convinces you that some compromised version of the inspired action really is following the light. It says “I know the light wants you to go to India next month, but why not study abroad in France next year instead? It’s a lot more practical, you’ll save money, there’s better food, and what’s in India anyways?”
It will take the pure inspired idea and twist and turn and bastardize it so that it is a lot more comfortable for you. It will present you an option that is a lot more palatable - so there’s less fear and resistance. This is the way of compromise, and it leads to a life of compromise.
The desire, as it comes in its purest form, often stimulates a mountain of resistance.
The desire intentionally draws you on the journey of your soul. The flickering light of desire is so appealing to you because it forces you to confront and move past the fear that is right now controlling you.
By confronting the fear and letting it go, by following the light through one leap of faith after another — we free ourselves. Our souls become more free, more expansive, more open to possibilities.
The object of our desire, that shinny thing that shimmers on the horizon, is the enticement, the stimulation, that provides the activation energy to carry us through the journey of the purpose of our lives.
A life of adventure, fulfillment, joy, love and deep satisfaction is a life lived in faith. A life of jumping off the cliff and knowing you’ll find your wings as you fall. That is a life of seeking out and blindly following that inner guiding light (knowing that it always has your back and things are always working out for you).
When that light flickers on the horizon, the soul living the life of deep satisfaction feels the resistance, hears the protesting of their rationality, feels the fear and anxiety swelling up inside and chooses to act on the signal anyways.
They leap and trust. And what they find is that they never had anything to fear. They find out that they are stronger than they knew, more resourceful than they realized, more capable, more intelligent, and more resilient than they ever knew. They glance back at that small mental cage that they were living in and realize that the glimmering light is showing them their path to freedom.
They realize that, not only can that light be trusted, it is the greatest gift they can ever receive.
Once you’re on the other side, it becomes obvious that this guiding light is showing you the path to freedom. It is revealing your path through the adventure of this life time — the rewards of which are lasting satisfaction, real love, true fulfillment, peace, joy and overflowing abundance.
The journey of this lifetime, then, the mission and purpose we all came here for, is to seek out our deepest desires. To climb and overcome the inner mountains of resistance that we all have and to have those mountains be illuminated by the pursuit of our greatest desires.
We are all born free. The mission of a lifetime is to experience just how free we actually are. But inside our illusions of security, we can’t experience any of it.
So we must leap.
The inspiration for this piece is that I am in the middle of my own leap.
When I felt that light, that intuitive flickering light in my chest I knew what to do. But the screaming voices of anxiety, fear, and panic came quickly after to convince me I’m a fool — that I should be staying home, that I should be saving my money.
But I move anyways.
I follow the light anyways because I know those voices. I know that fear. I’ve done this dance already a thousand times and I know all the awesome stuff that happens when you follow that inspired path.
I have taken enough similar leaps of faith in the past to get enough of a handle on the fear and anxiety that it doesn’t control me anymore. Sure it might be pleading its case, but I try my best not to listen.
I know that it is my scared, inner toddler that just wants to know that it is safe and protected. I know that sometimes that toddler screams a lot. Its ok. It’s a toddler, I don’t expect it to know any better. But I also have learned not to let the scared toddler be in charge of my decisions.
I know that the guiding inner light is the way to my highest calling, my greatest good. So I trust.
Let’s all heal ourselves, follow our dreams, and discover what’s possible. If you would like guidance on finding and following your own inner light, reach out to me at email@example.com.